"FIGHT YOUR ADDICTION!"
"(OR REALIZE YOUR KID'S MIGHT HAVE A PROBLEM!)"
NOTES BEFORE READING:
**I STRONGLY SUGGEST PARENTAL ADVISORY BEFORE READING THIS IF UNDER THE AGE OF 16.**
| The Fight Begins! |
| We Have Hope! | Parents, Protect Your Kids |
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This entry will explain a perspective from someone who was exposed to porn at a very young age (around 8 or so) and struggled with it for the past 10 years! I let sexual impurity dominate my life for over 6 years. When I quit I deleted over 12,000 perverse pictures and over 100 porn videos! God wants you pure and this article will explain how this is possible.
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**Pornographers use many character names that appeal to children such as “Pokemon”.
**Average age of first Internet exposure to pornography is 11 years old.
**Boys 12-17 are among the biggest consumers of pornography.
**Largest consumer of Internet pornography 35 - 49 age group.
**15-17 year olds having multiple hard-core exposures 80%.
**8-16 year olds having viewed porn online - 90% (most while doing homework).
**1 in 3 porn users are women.
Sources:
*http://life.familyeducation.com/boys/sexuality/36492.html
*http://internet-filter-review.toptenreviews.com/internet-pornography-statistics.html
This is the part where my flesh has cried out (the very moment I write this blog) that I have a reputation to uphold and can't expose this, but it must be exposed so I can fully surrender to His glory and will. The only people who know about this are my brother and a select few people I know online, this secret I kept will be exposed. My flesh told me I didn't have to expose this in my original testimony, I feel strongly now that it's a must while writing this article. This life is not about me and my reputation, but Him and furthering His kingdom.
The image wasn't a normal image but that of a homosexual nature, from there on out my mind would not only be attracted to women but to men as well, as well as a mix of both men and women (transgender).
From ages 8-14 or so I rarely looked at porn (maybe once a month if that). When I hit 14, I found a good "connection" to get porn magazines through. From then to when I hit 18 my addiction grew to a few times a week, mainly looking at magazines. Our computer was in the family room, just a few feet from where my dad usually was, which is the main reason I didn't look at much porn on the computer. That didn't stop me (and won't stop your kids); sometimes I would still look at it on the computer. Will talk about this further in "Parents, Protect Your Kids".
After I hit 18 the porn no longer did it for me and the first chance I had I lost my virginity after I moved out of my parents house. I still was spending the same amount of time each week looking at porn. I then moved out of state and it escalated, I moved in with a girl and sex was a daily thing. The sexual impurity/porn was out of control AND NOTHING fulfilled my lust. I only had temporary satisfaction. I moved home a few years later and from there on out my addiction to porn escalated from weekly to daily and from "softcore" to more hardcore. Grew into more sick and twisted things, nothing EVER satisfying my urges. Rarely having sex although it wasn't absent from my life. I indulged in more perverse sexual acts and types of pornography, my lust grew stronger and the satisfaction grew weaker and weaker.
If you read "The Vision" on my front page you will notice this:
"I saw flashes of past decision- halfhearted for the Lord it was like black sticky tar was still attached and pulled you back- over and over- I could see the sadness on your face- hopelessness and everything behind you pulled you back constraining you."
Only a few people know (mainly people who went to my church) that during a service about 1.5 years ago I was pulled up front during an alter call because I was unwilling and was asked "Are you ready to change your life?" Out of obligation I said yes. I was temporarily changed. During this time the Lord actually delivered me from lust. I literally could look at a female without any sexual desire or thought at all. In person I never really looked at males with lust, just during porn. Might have been the fact that I wasn't willing to let anyone EVER know that I thought about men and transgender women like that. During the week I was delivered I didn't read my Bible or try to interact at all with God, I figured I didn't have to and I would still be close to Him (mistake). I forget the reason, probably something stupid like I was tired, but I skipped church exactly one week after and I was looking at porn that night. I was deeply involved in porn and sexual acts from that day until February 26, 2012. Was I delivered again out of this strong lust? NOPE but there is HOPE! I feel like God told me "I delivered you at first to prove that it didn't matter because it would be taken for granted, you will only be free through following Me." And I have been free! (Update - 1 Month Without Porn! PRAISE GOD!)
If you are struggling with homosexual acts keep in prayer as it is sinful (even if you aren't looking at porn or having sex). If you are in deep struggle with it you may want to consider Christian counseling, either professional or pastoral.
Romans 1:26-27 (KJV)
"26 For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:
27 And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.orking that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet."
Leviticus 18:22 (KJV)
"22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination."
After writing this my devotional from Prime Time with God for March 17, 2012. Excellent devotion I think everyone should get! To sign up click here!
Today's Prayer
Dear Lord, I offer myself to you as an open vessel. Please work in my life and accomplish your will through me. Every little thing and every great thing that is accomplished, I praise you for it and give you all the glory. Thank you for blessing my life with your power and presence. In Jesus' name, amen.
A Refiner's Fire
TGIF Today God Is First Volume 1, by Os Hillman
03-17-2012
"For he will be like a refiner's fire or a launderer's soap." - Malachi 3:2b
The Lord has a specific manner of preparing His people for useful service. God desires to turn His children from rough, hard-edged stones into gems of gold and silver.
"He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver; He will purify the Levites and refine them like gold and silver. Then the Lord will have men who will bring offerings in righteousness, and the offerings of Judah and Jerusalem will be acceptable to the Lord, as in days gone by, as in former years" (Malachi 3:3-4).
The refiner's fire can only accomplish its purposes when the heat is turned up to extraordinary temperatures. It breaks down the metal in order for it to become moldable and shapeable. Only when the temperatures reach this level can the work be fully accomplished. So it is in our lives.
Until the Lord completes His refining process, the offerings we make are not made in righteousness and cannot be acceptable. Thank God that Jesus is our righteousness and that there is no righteousness apart from Him. Still, the Lord continues to purge all that is not of His righteousness out of our lives. This comes through trials that bring each of us to the end of ourselves in order that He may only reflect that which is Himself.
When God takes you through the refiner's fire, be encouraged because it is His overriding commitment to turn you from a rough, hard-edged stone to a precious metal. He will do this through certain events in your workplace, your relationships, and other circumstances in your life. Our job is to avoid trying to blow out the fire.
Today God Is First (TGIF) devotional message, Copyright by Os Hillman, Marketplace Leaders.
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Regardless of how it came to be, during the first week of my re-dedication to Christ I had severe pain in my groin area where I couldn't even touch down there without massive pain. Thank God for that, this gave me time to get into the Word of God, pray, and initiate my new relationship with Christ without temptation! After a visit to the doctor and some medication I am doing better. During these weeks God has shown me the tools I need to use as well as the options I have against fighting sexual immorality --mainly porn because since my transformation people realize I no longer want to partake in any sexual act and if asked I simply give them my testimony.
Unfortunately, porn is becoming socially acceptable and being called normal in our society. This clearly goes against what the Word of God says. Not to mention becoming addicted takes away from your marriage. If you are not married it causes you to be desensitized to what God's purpose for women are, making it hard if not impossible to love how you should in a relationship until He changes you. Let's take a look at some Bible verses about sexual immorality and lust.
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (KJV)
"18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?
20 For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's."
1 Corinthians 6:9-10 (KJV)
"9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,
10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.
Matthew 5:27-30 (KJV)
"27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:
28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell."
These verses show how wrong this sin is (although all sins are equal it is the only sin we commit against our own body [where the Holy Spirit is]). Showing not only how bad sexual immorality is but just looking at a woman in lust is(in porn or even in public). Be very aware Satan and his demons will do anything and everything to interrupt your walk with the Lord, they hate God and they hate you! They will use social media of all kinds to keep your temptation strong!
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Matthew 26:41 (KJV)
"41 Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak."
Jeremiah 29:11 (KJV)
"11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end."
Romans 12:12 (KJV)
"12 Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;"
Even when it feels like all your hope is gone remember these verses, memorize them and look deeper in to the Bible, there are plenty more! Below is the list I feel will help you become free from your pornography addiction. Jesus Christ is the ONLY way to fight this temptation/addiction.
The FIRST thing to do is put on the armor of God every morning when you wake up to protect you in the spiritual realm. This helps resist these attacks, as well as other temptations!
Ephesians 6:10-17 (KJV)
"10 Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.
11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
15 And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:"
The SECOND thing to do is "body slam" every vulgarity that pops into your head immediately, the thought alone is not a sin, dwelling on it is. The more you "body slam" these thoughts the easier it is to resist and stop them in the future. As well as "body slamming" them immediately say a quick prayer, if it's a strong attack a long prayer. Something maybe like: "Dear Lord Jesus you know I am under attack with lustful thoughts and I REBUKE them in your name Jesus Christ, they have no place in my thoughts or mind, in Jesus Name I pray, Amen!"
The more and more you pray when these temptations come along the easier it gets to resist them.
2 Corinthians 10:5 (KJV)
"5 Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;"
(Thanks Pastor Dave for giving me this verse!)
Philippians 4:8 (KJV)
"8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."
The THIRD thing is to read the Word of God after you pray. Even if you just read a few verses, a few chapters, this will help tremendously. Read and pray until you feel like the attack is gone. You will notice this helps rid the mind and fights the thoughts as well as helps and encourages you to read your Bible more! Learn your Bible and spend time with Christ, DAILY!
2 Timothy 3:16-17 (KJV)
"16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:
17 That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works."
If you find yourself having dreams about it once you have stopped looking at it for a few days pray before bed asking God to protect your thoughts and dreams while you are sleeping. Reading the Word of God helps before you go to sleep as well because your mind will go to bed thinking about what you read.
The FOURTH thing I do is when I'm sitting on the computer I am always listening to Christian music regardless of what I'm doing. You can choose your music, but I suggest K-Love, you get amazing uplifting songs and awesome inspirational messages. Click the "Listen Online" button after you are on the main website to stream it online. A video is posted below that is a great tool to listen to and use as a pray whenever you feel an urge.
The FIFTH thing to do is remember if you ever feel you are getting overwhelmed or can't control your urge, or are in a situation with someone tempting you to have sex: ESCAPE, RUN, GET OUT. YOU WILL BE SO HAPPY YOU DID! If you find that you can't escape porn on your computer during these times put your computer in a universal area where someone can watch over and keep you accountable. Boredom leads to your mind straying!
The SIXTH thing is to install software on your computer and get an accountability partner, preferably someone with your same beliefs that agrees porn is wrong. First off install the software to block pornography sites. For a free Internet filter, K9 Web Blocker does its job well, providing a broad collection of options for customizing your remote web supervision needs. http://download.cnet.com/K9-Web-Protection/3000-27064_4-10487710.html
Unfortunately someone who wants to get past filter software will find a way. That is why having an accountability partner who has the same outlook that porn is sinful and destroying you! Some great software I have used is below. It emails your partner all the questionable sites you visit http://www.x3watch.com/. This software comes from the XXXChurch; a great network of resources that are all about having freedom over your lust! (Although I don't completely agree how they market some of there items and stuff, it does have some good articles and other resources.)
Another excellent resource to check out is http://www.mitchin.com/Pornography.html.
I want to make a point that for married couples sexual intercourse is not sinful (pornography in marriage is still sinful). When two people become married and have sex they ultimately become one by joining two spirits, two minds, and two bodies. The most intimate knowledge of this comes when two Christians become married. This also is a reason Christians have more stimulating sex because two non-Christians or 1 Christian/non-Christian can't join in 2 spirits.
Above paragraph about marriage was paraphrased and revised from:
http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/200Questions/article_13.aspx
1 Corinthians 7:4-5 (KJV)
"4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency."
A great video with a great message to pray and inspire you when you are feeling the need to look at porn is "The Afters - You Life Me Up" .
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Ways to protect your children:
1.) Put any computer or anything with access to the internet in the area with the most traffic by you, the parents. Always be able to see the screen from where you are sitting. If your child complains about not being able to listen to music loud or something of that nature all devices have a headphone jack you can use so that they can listen at the sound level they desire without bothering anyone else. Do not put it in a room where you can't see the screen, even if it's 10 feet away. My parents did this and I still managed to look at porn and minimize the screen whenever I suspected anyone was looking or near, I never got caught... although I wish I did. THIS IS A MUST! NEVER, EVER, allow anything with internet access in your child's room. They may not even be looking at porn and get exposed and become addicted. It only takes one image for addiction and God will hold YOU accountable.
2.) Like listed previously in the "We Have Hope!" section, get software installed on your computer to filter the internet. You can get this type of software free. For a free Internet filter, K9 Web Blocker does its job well, providing a broad collection of options for customizing your remote web supervision needs. http://download.cnet.com/K9-Web-Protection/3000-27064_4-10487710.html
I suggest getting some type of software called "key logger" software. You put it on the computer your children and even spouse use and it logs EVERY KEY THEY TYPE for you to view. This is one of the select few ways that is almost impossible to get past. I haven't used this software but I read about it and it seems like it would work great and has a 30-day free trial. If you don't like it you can always look for a different kind, they are called "Key logger software." http://www.best-spy-soft.com/" They make this type of software for cell phones too. Don't think it's not possible to do on cell phones because it is. Although I never did because I never had a phone that did anything more than texting/calling, kid's are doing this, I personally know people who do my age.
3.) Check your internet history often, and if it randomly becomes deleted be very skeptical about the reasoning, as it would was probably deleting porn history. To check the history on your internet, click and hold the Control + H Key, "Ctrl+H". Browse the sites and make sure nothing is suspicious.
4.) Be watchful! Internet history can easily be deleted. There are also some internet browsers that have a "private browser" option which you can use and when your done browsing and close out of it nothing gets saved. I know Firefox has this.
Remember it is your responsibility to watch out for your children. It only takes one exposure to pornography like I happened with my 16 years of struggle. Other sites you want to be checking for are internet dating sites, craigslist.org, and chat rooms. Those are the meeting places for people who want to have sex in person or "cyber sex." It's time to take a stand against society and Satan's lies! Let your children keep their innocence.
IT IS FINISHED! I SPENT COUNTLESS HOURS OVER A DAY WRITING THIS. YOU CAN CHANGE! YOU HAVE THE BEST COACH POSSIBLE IN YOUR CORNER! THE ONLY COACH THAT WILL WORK, JESUS CHRIST!
Special thanks for the support and grammatical help after!
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